I whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.
“A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.”
I have no fans. You know what I got? Customers. And customers are your friends.
My five favorite Weird Al Yankovic songs:
“You stopped breathing once when you were five weeks old. Did I ever tell you that?”
No, she certainly hadn’t.
“I was about to take a bath and then I thought I’d better check the crib, so I went in and you weren’t moving at all. I thought you were dead. I snatched you up and tore out of the house to the Jensens’ and pounded on the door, and right then you let out a cry. Anyway, we took you to the doctor.”
“What did the doctor say?”
“He wasn’t sure. He didn’t think it was a seizure. I guess it was just one of those things that happens sometimes.” Then she got up to make a salad for supper.
That’s how Mother told stories. Never enough detail, and she always left you hanging at the end. If she had gone ahead and run the bath water, I’d be dead right now. And it was “just one of those things that happens sometimes”? I felt a little weak myself. I had gotten over the fear that I’d stop breathing during the night, all those years I used to remind myself to breathe, and now this. So I wasn’t dumb to think that your breath could stop at any time. It could happen right now, sitting on a white kitchen chair in a cool breeze and drinking iced tea. Fall over dead on the linoleum. Thirteen years old, dead.
Garrison Keillor, Lake Wobegon Days
I was supposed to run 10.75 miles this morning, but miscalculated where I needed to make a U-turn, so it was actually 11 miles on the nose. It took me almost exactly an hour and forty-five minutes — not bad for a week shy of 41 — and put me over 77 miles for the […]
According to my Nike Running iPhone app, I’ve logged over 475 miles on my Nike Free 4.0 sneakers, and it’s time for a new pair. I only ever wear them for running, so that’s actually pretty accurate. I have no idea what the average lifespan is for a pair of sneakers, and I suppose Nike […]
I probably should not have bothered to watch the end of the Spurs @ Heat game last night, but I didn’t want to have missed it in case Miami managed to make a comeback. I still managed to hop out of bed at 5:15AM and lace up. I spent about fifteen minutes stretching and waiting […]
I had a brutal migraine when I went to sleep last night. I managed to make it through Game of Thrones and then conked out, still in pain despite several pharmaceutical attempts to relieve the ice pick in my brain. It was still there when my alarm started ringing at 0600, but I knew it […]
I love you, sis.
The regional government in Calabria, Italy, has approved a bill that would reduce prison sentences in exchange for reading books: For certain inmates, sentences would be cut three days per book. The bill will now go to the Italian Parliament. The bill was inspired by “Redemption Through Reading,” a similar program that’s been successful in […]
My five favorite Beach Boys songs:
Here are five of my favorite shows which my wife watches that I would never admit I enjoy:
Today is the birthday of Roy Orbison (1936), born in Vernon, Texas, to Orbie Lee, a mechanic, and Nadine, a nurse. One day, during a songwriting session with his partner Bill Dees, Orbison asked his wife, Claudette Frady Orbison, if she needed any money for her upcoming trip to Nashville. Dees remarked, “Pretty woman never […]