clothes

This is one of those excellent links that you hope will always be on-line somewhere, but that you know will soon disappear into the lost history of the web.

DKNY Men’s Leather Pants I Unfortunately Own
These were not cheap leather pants. They are Donna Karan leather pants. They’re for men. Brave men, I would think. Perhaps tattooed, pierced men. In fact, I’ll go so far as to say you either have to be very tough, very gay, or very famous to wear these pants and get away with it.
…
They are size 34×34. I am no longer size 34×34, so even were I to suddenly decide I was a famous gay biker I would not be able to wear these pants. These pants are destined for someone else. For reasons unknown - perhaps to keep my options open, in case I wanted to become a pirate - I have shuffled these unworn pants from house to house, closet to closet. Alas, it is now time to part ways so that I may use the extra room for any rhinestone-studded jeans I may purchase in the future.
These pants are in excellent condition. They were never taken on pirate expeditions. They weren’t worn onstage. They didn’t straddle a Harley, or a guy named Harley. They just hung there, sad and ignored, for a few presidencies.
Someone, somewhere, will look great in these pants. I’m hoping that someone is you, or that you can be suckered into buying them by a girl you’re trying to bed.

I bought a soopah comfy blue hooded sweatshirt here this weekend and they threw in a hat for free! (I’m wearing it on the web cam right now.) The entire store smelled like grape Bubbilicious. How can you not buy something from a store that overwhelms you with grape flavor?

I found some really cool clothes at a place called Guyshop.
[There's a Girlshop, too, obviously. I trust her taste, and that's why I lifted the link from an AS production.]

So. You still want to sleep with me. You still want me there when you wake up in the morning. You still want to run your mouse ball over my face. I know you do. So I’ve worked on it a bit more. With the help of Paint Shop Pro and an image from Dan I’ve redesigned my sell-out site for you. That’s right. You can go to my store and buy a t-shirt, coffee mug, or mousepad to remind you of me all day and all night.

Today … I’m wearing big pants.

So. You want to sleep with me. You want me there when you wake up in the morning. You want to run your mouse ball over my face. I know you do. So I’ve finally done it. With the help of Bryan and Lisa, and the inspiration of Firda, I’ve created a complete and total sell-out site for you. That’s right. You can go to my store and buy a t-shirt, coffee mug, or mousepad to remind you of me all day and all night. Am I good to you or what?

Happy birthday Aunt Audre!
Happy birthday Jason!

If anyone is still working on birthday presents for *me* … I could really use a new belt. I basically have only one good belt, and it’s black, so it doesn’t - y’know - look good with brown. Am I making sense? Probably not. The thing is, see, I really want a pair of brown 8-eyelet Docs and I don’t have a good excuse because all I have is black ones now. I also seem to have run out of notches in my belt. This is not because my gut is … <warning! my only internet joke is coming!> … eNormous, though. The belt is the same one I wore to my high school graduation I think. (Or maybe I got it my first year of college. Whatever. That’s not really the point.) So, to sum up: I want a new belt. I have no notches. Is this clear?

[David Gagne reserves the right to make or not make sense on his own blog with no regard to anyone else's happiness.]

Seriously, monkey, how could you *not* mention that I am the one who institutionalized Hawaiian Shirt Fridays? Man! I get no love.