DSL

Everything in the previous post is completely true. That is a very accurate representation of my birthday. Any resemblance to Brad’s tale of aDSL hell is purely coincidental and if you haven’t read it yet, you should.

The cable guy came to the house on Friday so there are now 130 channels of mind-numbingly horrible entertainment in my home. While he was here he convinced me to get RoadRunner cable internet service. It wasn’t that tough of a sell after all the shenanigans I’ve experienced simply trying to *find out* how to get DSL. Jeez. I hadn’t even begun to try and *get* DSL. So my birthday present to myself will be to hang out here from 10am to noon and wait for the RoadRunner guy to start me on my way to blazing, always-on, internet service. That, and I think I will go buy the new Sony 5-Disc changer with digital MiniDisc link that I’ve wanted for like a week. Then I will have TWO … count ‘em … TWO Sony 5-Disc changers. I am a heathen.

Maybe I have been influenced by reading about TheBrad’s trials. Maybe I am being too hard on GTE and the other places that obviously really want me to get DSL service here. I think I will go to bed now and try this again in the morning. These kinds of things always seem to go more smoothly after I’ve had three or four cups of coffee.

Astonishingly, “Do you guys have your heads up your asses?!” is not one of the questions on the GTE DSL Services FAQ page. Here is a sample Q&A from the page:
Will it affect my service if my area code changes?
– No, when your area code changes, the physical copper line that runs from your home to a GTE switch in the Central Office isn’t disturbed and neither is DSL.

To find out how you can litererally connect with GTE DSL Service, click on the following information for a complete overview of DSL components, pricing and the steps to getting GTE DSL.

I will not pay attention to the spelling error. I won’t. I’m not looking at it.
What the hell do they mean by “literally connect”?!? Is that as opposed to some sort of metaphysical connection that they think I might have now?!

The Rapid Systems Corporation’s DSL page notes that they have Free Virus Scanning and Intrusion Detection included Free! I think that it would be annoying if I had to pay for a Free (always capitalized!) service, don’t you? Does anyone in DSL-world believe in proof-reading? The site says that I can get a “dedicated IP address assigned to you”. I think someone, somewhere would be upset if I had a dedicated IP address that had been assigned to someone else! At the bottom of the page there is a form that I can submit so they can tell me if service is available for my area. The form is titled: Do your line qualify for aDSL?

We’ll ignore the fact that all these companies are supplying ISP service for GTE. The GTE web site has a handy little form that tells me immediately that I very much can get DSL on my line. GTE was recently bought by Verizon so there are all sorts of fun and confusing things happening at the GTE web site.

Note: If you don’t type the www you can’t get to the GTE page. Who set up their web server?! You can even get to davidgagne.net without the www …

Wow! This EarthLink page about DSL service says that they have FREE equipment, installation, and set-up! Then it says that the offer requires self-installation!

So, if I install it myself, they’re not going to charge me to install it?! Huh? Join me now as I begin to follow TheBrad’s ill-fated path …

I’ve come to think of blogging as the new bookmarking. I almost never click in my Favorites menu these days. So pretty much nobody but me will want to go to this site. It’s the one for GTE DSL Services. As much as I admire TheBrad, I have to hope and pray that my experience will be better than his. This is currently tops on my ever-expanding, rarely-referenced, hardly-a-help Things to Do list.

I was just in the middle of reading about TheBrad’s journey through ADSL Hell when the thunder began a-rollin’. Hard core thunder. Thunder such that you would be hard-pressed to determine if what you were hearing was thunder or someone trying to recreate the running of the bulls at Pamplona in your attic. Thunder so loud that you could possibly be hearing impaired from its volume. Oh, yeah. Tampa is gonna be a fun place to be.