Grammar Matters

Posted February 27th, 2003 and filed under rants, writing.

The “plural apostrophe” (e.g. no dog’s allowed, sofa’s for sale, UGH) is running rampant these days, and it’s not just my imagination. It’s so wrong that I can’t even begin to fathom how anyone could make such a mistake. I hate it when people dismiss it with, “Oh, not everyone’s a grammar freak.” Grammar? You… Read more »

Impact the Itch

Posted April 23rd, 2002 and filed under rants.

Someone commented on my mini-rant that the words “itch” and “impact” are not verbs. The reader seemed to suggest that the appearance of these words in “a dictionary” as verbs is a viable argument for them being accepted that way. My reply: There are many words in “the dictionary” that are not words. You cannot… Read more »

Sir Gawain

Posted April 10th, 2002 and filed under writing.

This is from an English lit. class; it was written on February 10, 1993 … Sir Gawain and the Green Knight What makes a man a hero? Where lies the line which when crossed changes a mortal man into a legend? Is it at the altar at Canterbury? in the Minotaur’s labyrinth? or is it… Read more »

How to Pronounce the Word Height

Posted March 18th, 2002 and filed under rants.

I want you to stop what you’re doing. I want you to look at the word below. I want you to speak it aloud. height How did it sound? Say it again. Did it rhyme with “right”? It should have. Say it again. Did it rhyme with “byte”? It should have. Say it again. Aloud,… Read more »

Ending Lists

Posted March 12th, 2002 and filed under rants, writing.

On list groupings and the correct use of commas Why does it seem that nobody knows the correct way to end a comma-delimited list? Did they stop teaching this after 1980 or something? Let’s review, shall we? First let me explain the philosophy upon which the correct use of “commas in lists” rests. It’s another… Read more »

Grammar

Posted December 21st, 2001 and filed under rants.

“Grammatical English is now the near-exclusive province of the middle-aged and elderly because it hasn’t been formally taught in most schools … for about thirty years. Knowledge of the mechanics of how words, clauses, and phrases are hooked up to form sentences and paragraphs has been withheld from most children for such a long time… Read more »

Top Ten

Posted August 20th, 2001 and filed under comedy.

I laughed out loud at #4 on the list of Top Ten Ways to Torture Your Professor: Hold fast, to your belief that, liberal and seemingly-random, use of, commas in term papers, makes you look, real smart.

vocab

Posted July 2nd, 2001 and filed under rants.

Not words: acrost, irregardless, nucular, supposably, nother, alot, alright Not verbs: interface, input, impact, itch

The English Language

Posted October 25th, 2000 and filed under rants, writing.

I really get aggravated when people try to argue their way out of what are really meaningless mistakes by saying that the English language is flexible and there aren’t any hard and fast rules and who cares if they’ve spelled something incorrectly because it doesn’t matter as long as you get it and blah, blah,… Read more »

Struck

Posted October 12th, 2000 and filed under rants, writing.

I took a class in early 20th century American literature while I was a student at the University of Florida. Every essay, book, or article we read struck someone somehow. I got so disgusted by students saying, “What struck me about …” or, “I was struck by …” that I wrote a response paper asking… Read more »

Accent

Posted August 29th, 2000 and filed under comedy.

Wicked Good Guide to Boston English

Hate Me for This

Posted August 4th, 2000 and filed under rants, writing.

A quick lesson on it’s versus its: it’s is a contraction of the two words “it” and “is”; if what you are trying to do is say, “it is,” and you want to do it without using that pesky middle i, use it’s its is possessive; try to think about how neurotic you would be… Read more »