I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery.

Daily David

General Stuff Florida’s Tim Tebow routinely rejects all kinds of sex requests. We had dinner at The Bazaar on Saturday night. It was tragically expensive — and I’m not really a “foodie” — but I can appreciate art. The LA Times review is spot-on. I love these vintage sexist ads. Yes, you must pick one. […]

Cynthia’s Restaurant 3

We had dinner last night at Cynthia’s Restaurant 3 (blog) on 3rd Street in Hollywood. (I am coming down the home stretch here of the Velocity Diet and get to have one HSM each day.) I have to tell you: If it wasn’t for my meal, I’d say this was a terrific place to eat. […]

The Velocity Diet: I Like Chocolate Edition

I completed Phase I of the Velocity Diet with my fifth shake on Sunday night. (I’ll write my review of Week Four soon.) I guess the guys at T-Nation are pretty good with their calculations, because I had barely enough Metabolic Drive shake mix to last me exactly through Phase I. By Monday morning I […]

Friday Five: Velocity Diet

Five Things That I Can’t Wait to Have Once I’m Done with the Velocity Diet

  1. French Fries
  2. Popcorn
  3. Emerald Nuts Smoked Almonds
  4. Emilio’s Chicken Piccata
  5. Coca Cola
The Velocity Diet – Week Three

This is day three of my fourth week on the Velocity Diet and at this point I am feeling pretty damn good about it. By this time next week I will be deep into Phase II of the program, during which I will get to consume a glorious healthy solid meal every single day. Right […]

The Velocity Diet – Week Two

We’re now two-and-a-half days into Week Three of the Velocity Diet, so I suppose I should post my update about Week Two. I’m not going to lie to you: Week Two was pretty rough. The workouts get much more gruesome and the desire to consume something other than protein shakes becomes brutal. But the change […]

The Velocity Diet – Week One

At this point Kelly and I are now officially through the first week of the Velocity Diet, and I have to be honest with you: It’s been tough. It is unbelievably surprising just how much I sincerely miss chewing food. I’ve now had forty-three protein shakes — 39 chocolate and 4 strawberry — and a […]

The Velocity Diet

My buddy Kelly and I have been going to the gym for about a year now. I have always been in pretty good shape — I have run the LA Marathon three times; I rowed for Florida Crew in college; and I have been lifting weights pretty regularly for more than a decade — but […]

Post-Workout Power Shake

And now, for your fitness fix, here is the recipe for the mega-awesome shake I had after the gym tonight: 4 ice cubes 1 cup 2% milk 2 cups water 1 banana 1 4oz Häagen-Dazs Coffee Ice Cream 1 raw egg 2 scoops Cytosport Chocolate Muscle Milk Throw everything into a blender. Hit the ice-crusher […]

E. Baldi

Just around the corner from Spago in Beverly Hills is a terrific little establishment named E. Baldi. (It’s the sister restaurant of just about the best place to eat in Los Angeles, Giorgio Baldi.) I had the amazing garganelle with meat sauce tonight, and didn’t realize until I was walking out the door that I […]

Visiting Atlanta

Last Sunday we had lunch with the Tobers at Six Feet Under in Atlanta. I had a terrific fried catfish po’ boy and about six gallons of sweet tea. You just cannot get sweet tea in Los Angeles anywhere, so it was a treat. Then on Tuesday, before the presidential debate, we had dinner at […]

Twizzlers v. Red Vines

There is one major difference between Twizzlers and Red Vines: People who prefer Red Vines will eat Twizzlers and claim that they’re very similar. People who prefer Twizzlers hate Red Vines. ‘Nuff said.

Rude Fortune

A few weeks ago I wrote about how annoying it is to get an “affirmation cookie” instead of one with an actual fortune. Well at lunch today one of my co-workers got what we thought was a horribly rude fortune cookie. Instead of the usual mindless drivel, instead of even a useless affirmation, the “directive” […]

Good Fortune

For a long time now my friends and I have been complaining about “affirmation cookies”. Fortune cookies just aren’t as cool as they used to be. It seems like all the fortunes we get now have messages that aren’t … well … fortunes. Instead they say things like, “You are a kind person,” or, “People […]

Body Bakery

Who in the world doesn’t want to eat bread that looks like human body parts?

Contextless Content: Episode #25 (Cottage Cheese)

kelly: You eat cottage cheese? GatorDVG: never kelly: Ah. Too bad. GatorDVG: as far as I’m concerned, it’s just some sort of cheese and spoiled milk combination. two of my least favorite things on the planet. kelly: Excellent for breakfast and before bedtime. Just the right blend of slow digesting carbs, protein and fat. kelly: […]

Night Golf at Porter Valley

On Saturday night Kelly and I played in a “Nite Lite” golf tournament at Porter Valley. One word: Awesomeness. The format was a Texas Scramble, which basically means everyone hits a ball and then decides who had the best shot. Then everyone hits from there as if that was his shot. We got to use […]

Disappointing Food

Fast Food: Ads vs. Reality

The Lodge Steakhouse, Los Angeles

On Sunday night we had dinner at The Lodge Steakhouse on La Cienega in Beverly Hills. The place was almost empty and for the better part of the night we had the entire large dining room to ourselves. For some strange reason this dark, rustic, wood-grained, hunting-outpost-themed restaurant was blasting hair-band hits of the late […]

A Foul Color Scheme

On my desk right now is a football-shaped bowl of Willy Wonka‘s Everlasting Gobstoppers. I poured three entire boxes into the bowl a few days ago and am now in trouble. You see, I’ve been methodically eating them by color. I started with red and then went to orange. The problem is that now there […]