future

For a long time now my friends and I have been complaining about “affirmation cookies”. Fortune cookies just aren’t as cool as they used to be. It seems like all the fortunes we get now have messages that aren’t … well … fortunes. Instead they say things like, “You are a kind person,” or, “People respect you.” Don’t give me that crap. Tell me not to get on the 405 on my way home, or that I’m going to have an adventure this weekend, or even to beware the bald man.

Yesterday I got my first fortune fortune cookie in years. It read:

You will never need to worry about a steady income.

That’s certainly nice to hear. Of course … it could mean that I’m about to get a life sentence for a crime I didn’t commit, or get hit by a bus. But I’ll try to be optimistic about it.

Wow! Have you seen the PHASST (Programmable High Altitude Single Soldier Transport) that Kinetic Aerospace Inc. is developing?!

You do want your own jet-pack, don’t you?

I have always had a strange attraction to the mod style of the Jetsons, Disney’s Tomorrowland, and things like that. I don’t know why. I just think it’s hip, y’know? Retro-cool. (Have you visited squaresville.com yet? It’s one of my favorite things links in the sidebar.) I’ve always been in love with the early Disney style. I think it has something to do with hoping and dreaming … like E.P.C.O.T.! What a great idea! The experimental prototype community of tomorrow! (It’s sort of similar to my recent blah-on-napster posts: Are you still using that? Dude. That’s just so 2000. (It probably also explains why I had to buy a visor as soon as they were released.)
P.J. O’Rourke says,

“It’s better to spend money like there’s no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there’s no money.”

Even better than E.P.C.O.T. was the little city you could see inside Space Mountain while you were riding the WEDWay People Mover (which is now called the TomorrowLand Transit Authority). Remember that? You were hot and tired and sweaty but still excited to be in Disney and you couldn’t wait to get on another ride or maybe see Goofy somewhere but you got a chance to relax and ride on the linear-induction-magnet-powered little trams all through TomorrowLand. You got to go through Space Mountain! And right before you came through the other side (so you were cruising above the gift shop, Mickey’s Space Pad or something) the music started … “It’s a great big, beautiful tomorrow …” and you got to see this whole huge little city with lights and a spaceport and hovercraft and robots and man it was just. freakin’. awesome. (Where is my jetpack?!)
Stop.

No way!!! Wow! Forget Moller’s Skycar … I want one of these!!!