Euphemism Generator

Posted and filed under comedy.

She seemed like a shy girl when they met, but a few drinks later, they were throwing the rubber bald-headed chutney.

Veni, Vidi, Vici

Posted and filed under books, quotations.

explorant adversa viros — “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” Literally it means, “misfortunes put men to the test.” from Veni, Vidi, Vici: Conquer Your Enemies, Impress Your Friends with Everyday Latin, by Eugene Ehlrich

Impact the Itch

Posted and filed under rants.

Someone commented on my mini-rant that the words “itch” and “impact” are not verbs. The reader seemed to suggest that the appearance of these words in “a dictionary” as verbs is a viable argument for them being accepted that way. My reply: There are many words in “the dictionary” that are not words. You cannot… Read more »

How to Pronounce the Word Height

Posted and filed under rants.

I want you to stop what you’re doing. I want you to look at the word below. I want you to speak it aloud. height How did it sound? Say it again. Did it rhyme with “right”? It should have. Say it again. Did it rhyme with “byte”? It should have. Say it again. Aloud,… Read more »

Ending Lists

Posted and filed under rants, writing.

On list groupings and the correct use of commas Why does it seem that nobody knows the correct way to end a comma-delimited list? Did they stop teaching this after 1980 or something? Let’s review, shall we? First let me explain the philosophy upon which the correct use of “commas in lists” rests. It’s another… Read more »

Signs

Posted and filed under comedy.

Do you know what the “M” in “ATM” is? Does it really irk you to see an “ATM Machine Inside” sign? If so, take a look at some of the photos at It’s A Wacky, Wacky World. Special-bonus-oldie-but-goodie link: The Periodic Table of Rejected Elements

The Weblog Dictionary

Posted and filed under blogging.

Lucky you! I went and updated my world famous blog dictionary. I added several new terms and changed the formatting. I received numerous requests for the functionality, so you can now easily link to entries. It’s also in css now, so you don’t have to wait for the entire table to load before you can… Read more »

verbalIQ

Posted and filed under comedy.

I just took a verbalIQ test that I found at leuschke.org. My overall score was a depressingly low 87%. I did well in the Reading Comprehension and Anagrams sections. I had never seen an Anagrams section on a standardized test. It’s an interesting concept, although I think it’s really just another form of a vocabulary… Read more »

Top Ten

Posted and filed under comedy.

I laughed out loud at #4 on the list of Top Ten Ways to Torture Your Professor: Hold fast, to your belief that, liberal and seemingly-random, use of, commas in term papers, makes you look, real smart.

ultracrepidarian

Posted and filed under quotations, rants.

Definition: In a word… ultracrepidarian: (n., adj.) a person who gives opinions beyond his scope of knowledge. “Nonexpert opinion or assumed authority – Don’t be swayed (or try to sway someone else) based on the opinion of an unqualified authority. The Air Force is chock-full of people who, because of their position or authority in… Read more »

Curses!

Posted and filed under blogging, music.

Damn! Foiled again by my puny ability to speak just the one language! Langreiter.com looks like an awesome page; I just wish I could read Dutch! (Or German. Or Nordic-Trac. Or whatever it is that this guy’s mostly writing / blogging.) And what could be a better time than now to mention that you can… Read more »

Miami

Posted and filed under travel.

I am standing at an AT&T Public Phone 2000i in the Miami International Airport. I’ve got several hours to kill here and I thought I’d check my eMail. Unfortunately, although I love the redesign at Hotmail.com, I can’t figure out how to retrieve my POP mail. It’s very frustrating. I doubt I have any interesting… Read more »