shopping

I dragged myself out of bed at 5:00am today and played 18 with Andy at Hillcrest Country Club. I shot an embarrassing 63 on the front 9, but an at-least-average 55 on the back 9. (My father-in-law gave me a round of golf lessons with the club pro at Lakeside Country Club as a gift for my 35th birthday. The goal is to break 100 before Christmas.) We were done by 9:30, so I grabbed a copy of Wired and drove to the Apple store in the Westfield Century City Mall.

I got in line at 10:05am and was (surprisingly) the 18th person. The store website said that they would open at 11, and I figured if I read every single article and advertisement in the magazine, I’d only have about an hour to stare into the sun waiting. My plan did not work. By 10:25 I had finished reading. But that’s okay. That’s when the fun began.

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Why would anyone blow their nose into a disposable piece of cotton when they can keep their boogers close to them until laundry day in a customized piece of soft cloth?

I am amazed that Paper Denim & Cloth doesn’t have its own website. I have searched Google and cannot find any authoritative site for the company. How strange. You’re selling $200 pairs of jeans and you don’t have a website?

Anyway. I was pretty proud of myself for snagging a brand new pair of PD&C on eBay for only $35. The original price tag showed that they were retailing for $198.00, so I felt like I made a steal. But then it was pretty funny when I wore them to work today and found another, handwritten, price tag stuffed in the pocket.

Good Will $6.99

For some reason you cannot find one on their website, but you can still get one of these from Banana Republic. I’ve seen them for sale in both the Santa Monica and the Studio City stores, and I’ve seen dozens of people carrying them over the last two decades. But yours just will not be as cool as mine. My mom bought me this bag from one of the original mail-order catalogs when I was in 8^th grade, in 1986. (That was back when BR was a small “travel & safari clothing” company and not a part of The Gap.) The ones they sell now are Made in China™ and seem to be pretty low-quality. Mine was actually Made in Israel and — since it’s been with me from one end of the United States to the other, to the Sandwich Islands, and all through England, Paris, and most of Italy — I can attest that it is just as awesome as the original description that I read and which completely enraptured me 21 years ago:

Authentic Israeli Paratrooper Briefcase
When called away suddenly on business (to Entebbe, for example), the Israeli paratrooper takes along a durable briefcase — one with D-rings, a padded adjustable shoulder strap, three big inside compartments appropriate for legal pads, and an exterior snap-flap pocket sized to suit a ponderous paperback. Also: two rows of sturdy loops for implements mightier than swords.

A couple of weeks ago I picked up a great linen shirt at Old Navy. It’s so great, in fact, that today I thought I’d go to the website and grab a couple more of them. Alas, I cannot. Their website is broken. This is a multi-million dollar company and they’re currently not able to sell anything online because of a database error. Bummer for them.

The PicoPad® is pure genius. It’s a pad of sticky notes — with a tiny pen — in a case the size of a credit card that you can easily slip it into your wallet. The PicoPad and its refills are also incredibly inexpensive. I am always scribbling notes on the backs of business cards and receipts in my wallet, so this is a product near and dear to my heart. My girlfriend gave me one last week and I’ve already used it several times.

I love books, for example, and can’t enter a bookstore without finding more than a few that I am dying to read. Instead of spending megabucks at the brick and mortar, though, here’s what I do: I jot down the ISBN and then, when I get home, find the title at Amazon. If I simply must have it, I’ll grab a used copy there for much, much less. Otherwise I add it to my wishlist for a rainy day.

If you have feet … you really should treat yourself to a pair of Doc Martens. They are the best shoes made anywhere. I got my first pair in Covent Garden in London over a decade ago and wore them almost every day for six years. The shoes are just incredibly comfortable and durable.

I got an email this morning announcing that they’re currently having a 40% off sale (use coupon code DMFF4005 at checkout) to promote the redesign of their site, so I figured I’d share.

Buy in Bulk and Save!
Preparation H suppositories supply soothing relief from the internal swelling, burning, itching, and discomfort associated with hemorrhoids. While most people likely don’t want to discuss hemorrhoids, it’s estimated that 75% of Americans will experience hemorrhoid symptoms at some point in their lives. Preparation H suppositories soothe these painful and frustrating symptoms by temporarily relieving burning while shrinking hemorrhoidal tissue, temporarily providing a coating of relief for anorectal discomforts, and protecting the inflamed, irritated anorectal surface to help make bowel movements less painful. Preparation H even offers a nighttime reprieve from suffering, allowing users to sleep better. Fortunately, hemorrhoids are rarely a serious health condition, but they are uncomfortable and bothersome, which is why Preparation H strives to give people the relief they need to enjoy everyday activities.

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This month in Maxim magazine there is a special Anti-Terrorism section. One page details several excellent gadgets you can buy to protect yourself from … well … bad guys.

Check out some of the crazy stuff you can buy:

• SpySite: a ton of cool toys
• portableelectricgenerators.com: the URL says it all …
• Approved Gas Masks.com: Gas masks galore!
• Delta Scientific Corporation: Destroy a 15,000 lb truck at 50 mph!
• Sensar-Stellar: Put an invisible sense-field around your house!
• Pedsco Canada Ltd., makers of the Bomb-Disposal Robot
• SecurityPlanet.com, for all your stun-gun needs …

Leia mentioned that a certain product was “really cool looking” so I thought I’d see for myself. She’s right: The product is quite sexy. The description of the product is even sexier. Can you guess what the item is from the following excerpt?

Put excitement into your work with InnDura’s UltraColor series. Heavy-duty polypropylene resists tears and repels moisture - and features hot new translucent colors. Tough, bright and big - this top loading ____x____ boasts a gusset that expands to a full inch … Available in blue, clear, green or purple.

Three years ago this month I made my very first purchase from Amazon.com. They sent me a coupon for a $10 discount on any purchase over $50 to celebrate my Amazoniversary. Is this a cheesy marketing gimmick? Yes. Does it work? Yes. I probably won’t even use the coupon; it expires on January 31st. But it’s little things like this that reinforce my belief that Amazon.com is the slickest “e-commerce” enterprise. As far as I’m concerned, they do everything right. Amazon and Google are the only two sites that have continuously improved over the years, and have (yet) to do anything to really tick me off. I love the fact that they remember what I’ve bought and what I own and what I’ve told them I like and dislike. (How cool would it be if you went to the grocery store and discovered that they had moved the beer aisle closer to the front door? And what if there was a clerk standing there saying, “I’ve noticed you like Budweiser. Did you know that many people who enjoy Bud also like Amstel Light?” or, “You’ve bought pretzels three times this month, so we started to stock more varieties to make sure you’re happy.” Or, heck! What if you got a letter from the grocery store saying, “You’ve been a great customer for three years now. Take $10 off the next time you come in!”)

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Just in time for Christmas! Check out Tourette Syndrome Barbie and Leprosy Barbie!

<begin rant>
Faces beware! I couldn’t find a true link to the evil razors, but this page describes the full Gillette product line. Watch out for the newest edition of the Custom Plus 10-pack of UltraGrip ™ Custom Blades ™. The LubraStrip ™ doesn’t lube anything. These things are horrible! I don’t know if I just got addicted to the Mach 3 or what, but when I tried to save a few bucks and go with this multipack of disposables I definitely made a poor decision. Razor burn? Absolutely. The blades didn’t shave my stubble; they ripped the hairs from my chinny-chin-chin. Ouch! I look like I lost a fight with a weed-whacker. Trust me on this one: Stick with the Sensor, Sensor Excel, or Mach 3.
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The best part about this product description is:

People who bought this also bought:
Pair of Duracell C Batteries

ha ha ha!
link via bunnydoesitbetter.com