Can I borrow your towel for a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo.

Contextless Content: Episode #26 (David Bowie)

GatorDVG: I didn’t know Elton John was gay until like 2002. a.friend: well, i can see that. I mean in the ’70s (when I was listening to him) he was considered cool rock and roll a.friend: still kinda is, just the gay thing never came up GatorDVG: I just thought the Donald Duck costume was […]

Contextless Content: Episode #25 (Cottage Cheese)

kelly: You eat cottage cheese? GatorDVG: never kelly: Ah. Too bad. GatorDVG: as far as I’m concerned, it’s just some sort of cheese and spoiled milk combination. two of my least favorite things on the planet. kelly: Excellent for breakfast and before bedtime. Just the right blend of slow digesting carbs, protein and fat. kelly: […]

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“Why would anyone blow their nose into a disposable piece of cotton when they can keep their boogers close to them until laundry day in a customized piece of soft cloth?”

Contextless Content: Episode #24 (Earthquake Alerts)

allison: did you know i also get earthquake text messages? allison: anything over 4.0 in so cal allison: bitchin GatorDVG: so when the big ones comes and you’re lying under a pile of rubble, like five minutes later you’ll get a text message GatorDVG: that’s great allison: yeah well i’d like to know how bad […]

Anti-Shark Device Eaten by Irony-Loving Great White

Anti-Shark Device Eaten by Irony-Loving Great White

Once in a Lifetime

Let’s get serious here. What’s better than Kermit the Frog singing the Talking Heads “Once in a Lifetime“? I can’t think of anything.

Big News for Men Named Dave

In other news: Dave Davidson was the author of the study.

Five Months of My Life, Gone

So apparently there’s a whole series of these parodies, but I think “Hitler: Bloodthirsty Dictator, Die-hard Cowboys Fan” is the best. Sure, it’s no Planet Unicorn, but it’s definitely the funniest YouTubery I’ve seen this year. <hat tip to Andy>

Understanding art for geeks

Great flickr photoset: Understanding art for geeks <hat tip to Jim>

Rough Times for 49ers Fans

A man walks into a bar with a cat in his arms and asks the bartender if the cat can stay. Grudgingly, the bartender agrees to let the cat sit on a bar stool, and he then turns on the 49ers game. When the 49ers kick a field goal, the cat just goes wild, jumping […]

Uncle Cave Man

“I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Cave Man the best. We called him Uncle Cave Man because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he’d eat one of us. Later on we found out he was a bear.” — from Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

A Chick with Problems Big and Small

Wow. You have got to feel bad for Kaitlin Corcoran. She’s got identity issues; she’s unclear on what her middle name is. She’s dating two guys at the same time, and they both have drastic problems with their anatomy. And she feels the need to tell me — a complete stranger — all about it. […]

Contextless Content: Episode #23 (Jewish Dental Supplies)

David Vincent Gagne says: you know what’s obnoxious? ebay ebay is retardo they email me when I have LOST an auction David Vincent Gagne says: why the #$@* would I want an email like that? a.friend says: i don’t even have the energy to talk abt why I hate ebay they send you might want […]

Aryan Bear Brotherhood

Beware the Aryan Bear Brotherhood.

Everyone Hates the War

Retired Gen. George Washington Criticizes Bush’s Handling Of Iraq War (via BrainLog)

Casino Royale with Cheese

A week or two ago I linked to a video clip my friend made: Casino Royale with Cheese, a seriously funny film about how James Bond would handle being paired with a really annoying partner. It’s a great little piece of web satire that’s now been nominated at the MTV Movie Awards! Go vote for […]

Casino Royale with Cheese

Casino Royale with Cheese

Mister Wong, the Offensive Social Bookmarking Portal

Great stuff from Ernie: Mister Wong, the Offensive Social Bookmarking Portal

Biggins on A1A

I saw this sign on A1A in Daytona Beach while driving back from my grandmother’s wake. It’s the kind of thing she would have thought was pretty damn funny. I really can’t think of a better name for a “gentlemen’s club” on the ocean.

Suck on it, Barry

Commissioner Bud Selig announced Tuesday the discovery that Hall of Famer Hank Aaron had in fact accumulated 50 previously unaccounted-for home runs … bringing his once record total of 755 to an even higher 805 and putting the all-time home-run record perhaps forever out of reach.