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You’ll have to forgive me. Sometimes I just can’t help myself.

Doctor: I have terrible news, sir. Not only do you have cancer, but you also have Alzheimer’s.
Patient: Well, that is horrible. At least I don’t have cancer.

Patient: Doctor, you have to help me! I think I’m a set of drapes!
Doctor: Oh come on! Pull yourself together!

Nurse: Doctor, there’s an invisible man in the waiting room!
Doctor: Tell him I can’t see him now.

Patient: Doctor, what’s wrong? You seem confused.
Doctor: I’m sorry sir. I just can’t figure out what’s wrong with you. I think it’s all the heavy drinking.
Patient: Well, then. I guess I’ll just come back when you’re sober.