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I’m confident that’s the way the saying goes. If it was, “Feed a cold, starve a fever,” it wouldn’t have the alliteration and would be a bitch to remember, so I must be correct. I suppose I could Google it. But that’s not the point. The point is that I’ve been under the weather this whole week. (And what the hell does that mean? Wouldn’t orbiting astronauts be the only ones ever not under the weather?) I got a flu shot this year — for the first time in my life — so I have been pretty sure that I had a plain, old, ordinary cold. But I also had a raging fever. So what are you supposed to do in that situation? The fact that I was desperately hungry while not being able to stomach the thought of eating anything posed deeper problems.

A five-day, six-250mg-tablet course of the antibiotic azithromycin was having no impact on what had morphed into a painful, clogging sinus infection. And the doctor agreed that it was probably economically and therapeutically a bad idea to go through another entire box of Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold & Cough Formula. (That’s 26 times I got to sing, “Plop. Plop. Fizz. Fizz. Oh! What a relief it is!” to myself.) So now I’m taking 20mg of prednisone and 400mg of Avelox (moxifloxacin HCl) each day, and a double-barreled shot of Nasonex (mometasone furoate monohydrate) twice each day. Unfortunately I completely forgot to ask the doctor if I was supposed to be eating heartily or not, which means I’ll compromise and simply continue what I’ve been doing, which is eating two Reeses’ Miniatures and a baby Kit-Kat every time I walk past my son’s Easter basket.