Posts in the category “quotations”
“Some people are born on third base and think they hit a triple.”
Lou Holtz
Elise Rules
Elise points out a plain and simple truth: Sometimes, the only way to teach an a55h0le a lesson is with a good ass-whuppin’.
“At that time my Dad made a pretty good living as a pirate so Mom really didn’t have a choice. She did eventually take some correspondence courses, it did take longer than usual due to our wanderings but she did manage to get an Associate’s Degree in TV/VCR repair (which was even more impressive in light of the fact that our boat had neither a TV or VCR).”
from the About Page at Scurvy Boy
Surreal
The Surrealist Compliment Generator says, “Certainly your trout are more proseperous to vacuum than the flying coachmen of Czar Nicholai!” How hoopy. link via benhammersley.com
The Daily Show
The view from my apartment was the World Trade Center and now it’s gone. They attacked it. This symbol of American ingenuity and strength and labor and imagination and commerce and it is gone. But you know what the view is now? The Statue of Liberty. The view from the south of Manhattan is now
ultracrepidarian
Definition: In a word… ultracrepidarian: (n., adj.) a person who gives opinions beyond his scope of knowledge. “Nonexpert opinion or assumed authority – Don’t be swayed (or try to sway someone else) based on the opinion of an unqualified authority. The Air Force is chock-full of people who, because of their position or authority in
“Life is the mayonnaise through which we squirt.”
Jason Kottke
A Few Good Reasons for Drinking
I’ve a few good reasons for drinking And one just entered my head If a man can’t drink when he’s living How the hell can he drink when he’s dead? – seen on a t-shirt for McSwiggin’s Pub, “where there are no strangers, only friends yet to meet”